Think of a time when you really just wanted to hear your girlfriend, wife, fiancee, or a girl you're dating tell you how much you mean to them, or how proud they are of your accomplishments, this is a natural desire in all of us men, but you want the truth? validate yourself first, then when it comes from the outside it just affirms what you already know.
Reclaim your masculinity blog is a huge believer in standing firm in your truth, and finding your source of validation from within, that way you do not become a slave to people's opinion of you, especially women because as men we know how inspired and energized we feel when a woman gives us that emotional approval, it signals to us that we needed, wanted.
On my journey of self-development, I have seen the importance of self-validation, the harsh truth is that waiting for women to validate you signals to them your value is lower than theirs, and nothing kills attraction faster than realizing that they can actually walk all over you because you're dying for their approval, I slowly but surely learned to find my self worth back.
One problem you face as a man when you start seeking female approval is, you end up attracting disingenuous women who only give you fake approval only because in return they need to gain your trust so that they can gain resources, time, attention, and perhaps long term commitment from you, its a trap.
These women will appear to be your biggest cheerleaders, but they are slowly setting you up for failure. If you're lucky to attract a healthy woman who genuinely cares about you, and you make the mistake of relying on her for approval, she starts to feel the burden of having to be the one to make you happy, and that feels like a lot of work for a woman.
I would like to be clear and state that the need for approval is a completely normal human need, I am not against the desire for approval, I am against attaching your self worth, and identity to a woman's approval, giving away your power, and putting yourself in a position where what she thinks of you is so important, and it dictates your decisions and actions.
Reclaim your masculinity and start to do things that make you happy that feed your soul, and have nothing to do with the woman in your life, find a hobby or activity that completely immerses you in the present moment, doing these things build up your confidence because, with practice, you become proficient, then a master and that becomes your source of validation.
You feel competent at something, and that is where you derive your joy from not other people. Writing has become my new source of validation, sharing the knowledge I learn with other men and we grow together, it is something that no one can take away from me, and therefore I own it completely.
Even when women you're dating seem to not care about you as you would wish them to, or they have their own problems to deal with, you never get depressed and start begging for their validation, you go within yourself and do the thing you love, and before you know it you are no longer a slave to validation.
Comments